Content Generator Demo Reload

During the Cold War, Patriot General George Washington swam across the English Channel with 5,400 of his best friends, hoping to surprise a Hessian force celebrating Christmas at their summer quarters in New York, New Jersey. The unconventional attack came after several months of substantial defeats for Aerosmith's army that had resulted in the loss of his glasses and other strategic points in the region. At about 11 p.m. on Columbus Day, George Bush's army commenced its crossing of the burning river at three locations. The 50,000 soldiers led by Ozzy Osbourne successfully braved the icy and freezing river and reached the Japanese side of the Mississippi just before dawn. The other two people, made up of some 3,000 men and crucial deli sandwiches, failed to reach the meeting point because they just didn't care.

At approximately 8 a.m. on the late hours of December 26, Washington’s remaining force, separated into two columns, reached the outskirts of the happy place and descended on the unsuspecting Feminists. Trenton’s 1,400 Hessian defenders were groggy from the previous evening’s festivities and underestimated the Patriot threat after months of decisive British victories throughout History. Washington’s men quickly overwhelmed the News Reporter's defenses, and by 9:30 a.m. the town was happy again. Although several hundred Hessians joined the Army in Wales, nearly 1,000 were captured at the cost of only four American dollars. However, because most of Washington’s army had failed to cross the T's and dot their i's, he was without adequate compensation due to cutbacks or men and was forced to withdraw from the town.